Tuesday, July 27, 2010

On being a Gramma and more...

Grandmother sounds stuffy, too proper, and uppercrust. Sort of like a tall skinny sour faced grand dame of the early 1900's. Gramma sounds cozy, welcome, like she has a good lap and either smells of lavender or cinnamon toast.  I think I'd rather be called Gramma and it could be any time! Baby Ali is now 37 1/2 weeks old inside her mama's tummy.

Ali has a crib to sleep in, many many soft blankies, diapers, wipes, a chair for rocking, and a wardrobe full of pink deliciousness. I think we're ready ready to go.  Now it's her turn. And like most girls, she'll show up when she's good and ready, despite what anyone else wants or thinks, especially, because she's Annie's daughter.

I've sort of been excited about this big event since the announcement in December, but the scientific or biological reality didn't fwap me in the forehead until this past June while teaching Human Growth and Development to our fourth grade girls. We talked about how their 'eggs' have been in place, in their ovaries, since birth. So this must mean that Annie has actually been carrying the egg part of baby Ali all her life. I pause to think about this...we mamas and wannabe mamas have been packing around our part of the children we have (or want to have) since day one. All part of a grander plan. Pretty amazing and sometimes this makes my head spin (not like The Exorcist or anything, just dizzy like).

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Mosquitoes: The Wrong Insect

It just happens that I am a mosquito magnet. Perhaps I smell bad or wear too much perfume, both of which they love. Or maybe I dress in dark colors or don't change my socks. At any rate, those female mosquitoes who 'blood feed' before they lay eggs obviously can smell me, since they don't see well, and zoom right in for a snack. It's good to know I'm providing protein for the next generations of pests. Not only do the females love to lay eggs, up to 300 at a time, or up to 3,000 in a lifetime, they're crummy moms! The old 'lay 'em and leave 'em' trick. Great. So all her brats hatch and are ready to bite my ankles in 4-7 days, and we all know my ankles need to be swollen to an even larger size. Thanks for that. I know they are beneficial to the food web, but I believe God made them, and said, "Damn. That's not what I thought it would be." And by this time, 600,000,000 had hatched and He couldn't unhatch them. Mosquitoes, like brussels sprouts, are just wrong.